A blog about a blog

Something new and interesting today, I have written a guest blog over at Cancer.net! It's about giving yourself a break - specifically after cancer, but I think you can apply the message to lots of situations, the general idea being that you should give yourself time to heal emotionally and physically from any trauma, and don't be hard on yourself if it takes longer than you initially thought. You can read my full blog post over at the Cancer.net blog. Hope you find it interesting and/or useful!

Raising awareness - not just a Facebook fad

There's a thing going around Facebook at the moment where girls post selfies with no make-up on, in order to raise awareness for breast cancer (what exactly the link is supposed to be between not wearing make-up and breast cancer, I'm not quite sure - if anything we should be posting pictures of our boobs? ...Perhaps not.) Some guys are posting pictures of themselves wearing make-up, and some people are posting pictures of their scars, asking people to donate, or telling people how to check themselves. Good stuff, I reckon.

It's so important to be in touch with our bodies. We may not always like them but they're the only ones we've got. So we should embrace them, look after them, and hopefully they'll serve us well. And as well as being aware of our bodies, we should be aware of our minds, and raise awareness within ourselves. Namaste.

Praise yourself for small achievements

I hate mornings. Every weekday morning I groan and grumble before rolling out of bed. The other day my partner said, as he often does in jest, "Yay, it's morning!" So I asked what was so great about it, and he replied: "You survived through another night!" I couldn't really argue with that!

I'm not sure if surviving another night is really an achievement I can take credit for, but it kind of works as an example for today's blog post, which is about praising yourself for your small achievements.

When we have a lot to do, we're having a stressful time or there just isn't very much going on, we can always give ourselves a pat on the back for something. It might be doing something small successfully, or something you do every day - sometimes just getting out of bed in the morning can be an achievement.

So take things a step at a time, and give yourself a pat on the back when you need to. It's all part of looking after yourself.

Take off your costumes

Thursday was World Book Day. Teachers and students alike went to school dressed up as their favourite fictional characters (or just anyone from a book it's easy to dress up as!). Which makes me think of the costumes we wear every day - the metaphorical ones, I mean.

We wear costumes for work, when meeting new people, when we're in new situations... the list is endless. Why can't we be the same person in every situation without being afraid of rejection or not fitting in? When we try to be the people we aren't, we make things more complicated than they need to be.

So tomorrow, don't wear a costume. Go out of the house completely naked instead.

(Not literally, of course.)

Love your fear

A while ago I posted in a Buddhism group on Facebook asking how people deal with physical pain. A member of the group responded to my question saying that they look after their pain like a baby (I paraphrase because I can no longer find the original post). I saw a similar post yesterday saying that people should look after their fear, comfort it and take care of it.

I have never thought of this before. I always seem to think of any physical pain or fearful thoughts as something evil, something that is an enemy, something to hate. I've never thought of it as something that needs to be nurtured or taken care of. But it isn't an alien being, is it? It's a part of us, and any part of ourselves should be treated with kindness, not with contempt. If we can take a different attitude to our fears and our pain, maybe we will cultivate more compassion for ourselves, and suffer less.

The power of body confidence

A while ago I was feeling a bit down in a way I hadn't really thought about properly or identified, and I realised that it was because I wasn't feeling happy with my body.

It was one of those things where I just didn't notice that it was making me feel unhappy, and I don't know what exactly it was that made me realise it. But once I did notice, I realised that it was having a bad impact on my self image and self-confidence, which isn't like me at all.

For me, it's my belly that's the problem. Apart from the fact it's a bit flabbier than it used to be, it's scarred and a bit misshapen from a couple of surgeries, which makes it not as pleasant-looking as it used to be.

But scars aren't anything I can do much about. They're continuing to fade, and yes, the bottom half of my belly area is a lot flatter than the bit just above it, but there's nothing I can do about that. All I can do is try and make it a bit more toned, and otherwise accept it for what it is. So in an attempt at the latter, I've taken a picture of it (anything in greyscale is automatically uber artistic, right?) to make me feel better about it.

And in my pictures, my belly actually looks a bit smaller from the front, compared to when I look down at it from my own point of view. And I do feel better about it, looking at this picture. It just goes to show that sometimes all you need is a different perspective.

We are our own siblings

Earlier today, I was thinking about a quote I remembered from one of my favourite TV shows, Frasier. While talking about their potential future family tree, Martin says this:

"And if you and Lilith got back together, you'd be his step-father and his brother and Niles would be your son and his own uncle!"

And I started thinking about how I'm kind of my own sister, because a sister is someone who has the same parents as you, which I do.

So in a way we're all our own sisters or brothers. (I hope this makes as much sense to you as it does inside my head!)

And with that theory, we should therefore treat ourselves as we would want our siblings to treat us.

The takeaway thought from this insight into my random thought trails? Be kind to yourself. And to your siblings, if you have any. Just another little reminder that happiness is in your control, and you can make a start by looking after yourself the way you deserve to be looked after - the way a sibling would look after you.

Love yourself this Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day! The message of today's blog is:

Love yourself.

I know what you're thinking, and you can stop that right now. What I mean is that it's important to love yourself, to pamper yourself, to accept yourself in the way that you love and accept your other half, friends or family.

When was the last time you treated yourself to a present (however small), gave yourself a compliment, or treated yourself the way you would want other people to treat you? If you can't remember, that's not good enough. Indulge yourself today, even if it's just by watching your favourite TV show, having a bath or eating a bit of chocolate.

So this Valentine's Day, whether you share it with another person or not, be sure to look after yourself and show yourself some appreciation.

"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."
        - Buddha