Sometimes I get scared and I don't know where to put it

Sometimes I put it in words. Very occasionally I put it in pictures. Either way, if it has somewhere to go, we both feel better.

For me, it's the whole Lynch syndrome thing. I have realised recently that it makes me feel like I have no control, but almost completely responsible at the same time, which is an odd combination. Because I can't control whether I get cancer again or not, but if I do get it again and it's worse than the first time, it will be my fault because I know it could happen again and that I should look for any signs and be vigilant, so it's my responsibility to look out for it and stop it before it gets bad. I have been forewarned. So yeah. It scares me sometimes. I tried to get rid of the feeling the other night by going on Tumblr and basically typing that I was scared about ten times, just to get it out. Didn't really make much difference, so I drew it instead.